Monday, September 8, 2014

Final week of #21DayFix

My 21 Day Fix turned out VERY differently than I expected. I did not follow the meal plan to a T after the 2 weeks (I have done 3 weeks so far - an extra 7 days).
I have not binged - seriously - in this time frame. I have eaten crap food and had PROPER servings! I never thought I would be able to do that and I have!
I "binged" and it was 3 servings of cashews (over a 4 hour period) and 2 luna bars - way better for me and less food than going to Chick-Fil-A and getting 12 count nuggets and then spaghetti (at least 3 servings) when I got home.
This is so triumphant for me that it is surpassing the shame I feel from eating 12 counts and spaghetti. I am so grateful to start to change my eating habits. This is a huge accomplishment. After this week, I plan on continuing. I will keep doing the Fix portion control and slowly weed out the foods that don't work with me, like beans (kinda delicious but really tangle up my digestive process) and dairy (milk, ice cream - neither sit well with me. Cheese is usually okay because I don't usually eat large portions and I pull the cheese off of pizza too).

I have legitimately began a new lifestyle and I am beyond thrilled. I can't wait to keep going and changing and finishing this off. I am so much more comfortable in my body.

On the other side, I am really feeling emotions. Due to not binging (stuffing my feelings with food), I am really emotional. I got into a sad funk last week and it took a literal crying fest on Doug's shoulder to shake it. Good to know I have a solution but it was a frustrating week. I haven't noticed better happys, but then I never binged when happy - just when sad, ashamed, lonely, frustrated, stressed. I feel so much better - and so much worse sometimes, but getting the emotion out by crying or exercise is doing me so much good!

I am so damn proud of myself!