Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Explains so much!

Woody Allen Article

The above article is SO explanatory of our culture in America today. The blame lies on the victim, who wore slutty clothes, or said yes with her body. No means no. No never means take advantage of me. I had a lot of trouble coming to terms with having been raped. It was hard to admit. I assumed people would think I was lying. It was scary for me to admit it, but it was scarier thinking that I would be locked in a cage of deceit, never able to tell the whole truth, my truth. I still struggle with that. I still struggle with admitting who raped me, and how, and my guilt sometimes eats me alive. I am still not over it. It is better. I don't often think about it, but I do think about it. I do think about how I was "complicit" (I wasn't) and I have to talk myself through it, more often than I wish I had to. It is so easy to put the blame on the victim. Rape is a horrible crime. There is a damn good reason that prisoners, murderers in particular, are known for despising and wanting to (and attempting to kill rapists/molesters - see this article as an example - this is a trigger for me, so I don't look often for articles such as these - though I found that one quite easily).
Our culture is a terrifying thing that mutes victims in favor of the perpetrators. I believe that we live in a society that is inherently a "boys club" by nature. "Boys clubs" are the loyalty and protection men offer one another; not a literal club, it is a description of the nature of how men and boys get along in the world. Societally, it is easy to note that boys are socialized to be masculine, fighters, protectors. It is scarier to note that boys grow into men who will protect another man who is violating another human (see Sandusky).

The Woody Allen article calmed me to a degree. I felt less alone after reading it. And that is a step in my right direction, my path to freedom and peace.